It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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