No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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