Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize