when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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