No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
