if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
