Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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