We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
