We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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