my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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