Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
