so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
