let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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