I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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