its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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