I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
