Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
