I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
