this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Randomize