i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
