btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
