I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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