you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
