Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize