WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
