i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
