she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize