the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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