Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
