Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Holy sore nipples Batman
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
