he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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