Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
