I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
