New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
