we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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