I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
