why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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