Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(925): View more from California

you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?

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(847): View more from Illinois

better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say

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(213): View more from California

The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.

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(913): View more from Kansas

Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...

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(706): View more from Georgia

they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ

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(564): View more from Washington

Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.

(564): View more from Washington

Oh, wait.. That's you.

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(926): View more from

Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.

(415): View more from California

I thought you didnt have a dog??

(926): View more from

Exactly.

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