let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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