On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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