but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize