And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
