I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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