he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize