After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
