Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
where am i from again
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
