but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
