Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Girls should come with a carfax report
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
