I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
