Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize